The headline basically says it all

>> Tuesday

DeRosa cashes in on career year, to sign with Cubs

Corny Bill Simmons-style analogy: The Cubs are kind of like that dorky, slightly clueless guy who tries really hard to keep up with fashion, but no matter what he does, he always seems to be a trend behind the people in the know. He goes to the designer stores and checks out the clearance racks, and something always catches his eye. But he always second-guesses himself. He thinks, "This looks really cool to me, but I'm unsure because it's marked down so much." After fretting about it for a few minutes and trying it on a few times, he decides to buy it. Later on when people see him wearing it, they either snicker a little at his charming but vain efforts if they're a fashion buff, or they simply don't notice. In the end, no one really cares or notices much, and he's squandered a small sum of money that could've been saved for the transmission leak on his car.

And for the hell of it, let's call this slightly clueless guy Mike Sever.

6 comments:

Mike 9:00 AM  

Kind of like the pot calling the kettle black, eh Vinnie?

And I'm not a week behind. I'm 20 years ahead of everyone else for when aforementioned passe style comes back. You guys are just jealous of my foresight.

Matt 11:58 AM  

Tapered leg jeans, a combover and white sneakers were never in style. That goes for you too, Manson.

Vinnie 12:20 PM  

I don't know. I think that was big in the '50s. But if that were to come back, wouldn't it have already happened by now? You might as well get yourself a powdered wig and a walking staff.

And as for "calling the kettle black," I am nothing if not the embodiment of style itself. The other guys can attest to my slick new Italian designer (outlet store) zip turtleneck sweater and cordouroy jacket.

Mike 1:42 PM  

Alright, All I can remember is the blue hoodie that got worn for weeks at a time regularly and the pajama pants at 3PM with the giant hole in them.

Matt Zuchowski 9:20 PM  

As the only person in America still wearing warm-ups, I can officially declare that none of us will be fashion plates anytime soon.

Vinnie 9:58 PM  

That blue hoodie still probably hasn't been washed. Though picking it up from my bedroom floor, I don't smell any gin on it. So it must've been washed at some point.

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