Come early, Cubs fans! First 20,000 through the gate get free Commemorative 1996 Steve Trachsel All-Star No-Doze Tablets!

Every so often a post-deadline deal goes through that's more or less superfluous but really does no one any harm. Team A puts a veteran on waivers whom they don't feel like paying for a few months, and Team B, though they don't particularly need said player, stakes a claim on him in case they decide they'd like to make a play on him in the coming weeks. Then Team A goes, "Here you go, suckers," and releases him to Team B. Because the player is just an unnecessary spare part on Team B, he spends the next month or two spectating before going home, either when the regular season ends or when his team trims down to its 25-man playoff roster.

Such, I thought, was the case with the Cubs' acquisition of Steve "Blood on the" Trachsel (or simply, "Blood on the," as Matt calls him for short). But my suspicions were proven wrong when I learned that the Cubs did, in fact, give up players to get Trachsel and have now been further proven wrong by the fact that he will be starting tonight's game against the Dodgers, which, as Matt predicts, will end just in time for last call at the Cubby Bear.

Cuddle up and grab your blankeys Cubs fans--This one's gonna feel longer than "Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands."