Wacky Quarterbacky

>> Monday

(Yes, that title is stupid and doesn't really make sense, but this isn't much of a post, so mind your own business.)

Since I get immense pleasure looking at statistics (like, to the point where they turn me on)--especially really odd ones--I thought it would be fun to revisit some of the hilarious weather-induced passing lines put up by NFL quarterbacks yesterday:

Derek Anderson, CLE: 9-24, 137 yds, 0 TD, 0 INT
Trent Edwards, BUF: 13-33, 124 yds, 0 TD 0 INT
Todd Collins, WAS: 8-25, 166 yds, 0 TD, 0 INT

...and my favorite:

Eli Manning, NYG: 18-52, 184 yds, 1 TD, 0 INT

I think going 18-52 is like the quarterbacking equivalent of the pitcher who gives up 10 ER in 1/3 IP or whatever. The amazing thing isn't that he misfired so many times but that he was asked to continue throwing, despite the terrible success rate.

In all, that's four QBs combining to go 48-134 (35.8%, or 12-33.5 per guy) without a single interception. Wacky! Curious, I called my buddy Joey "Numbers" Mancini over at the Elias Sports Bureau to find out if this has ever happened before. He said, "Whatdya think?!" and then hung up on me, so I figure that means no.

Of course, the funniest passing line of the day had nothing to do with weather, only the 6.5" of suck that fell on Chris Redman's lawn:

4-15, 34 yds, 0 TD, 2 INT, 0.0 RAT

More so than the 0.0 rating, what I find so hilarious about this passing line is that Redman wasn't even pulled from the game. That actually accounts for the Falcons' entire passing output... four completed passes, 34 yards. Good God, the Falcons are awful.

But fear not NFL QBs, one man will atone for all of your poor performances tonight when he makes his long-overdue return to an NFL field and stuns a national TV audience with a masterpiece not seen since Sammy Baugh lit up the Cleveland Rams for 753 yards and 9 TDs in the 1942 NFL championship game (note: may not have happened), and the heavens will sing "Hallelujah," for Kyle Orton is back!

4 comments:

Matt 2:51 PM  

34 yards? That's all we got? 34 god damn yards passing?

I'd like to think that the reason that happened is that the Falcons didn't replace Bobby Petrino and just went coachless this week and Redman called his own plays, but no, they don't even have that as an excuse.

Also, a special thank you to mother nature from me, for fucking me over not once but twice with Derek Anderson and Tom Brady. All my hopes for fantasy football now rest on the mantle of Visante Shiancoe. I'm cautiously optimistic.

Also, I need Orton to light up the Vikings.

I'm fucked.

Patrick 10:58 PM  

Hey Orton may not have lit up the Queen's, but man did you see the presence that he brought to the huddle...

What I would do just to be in one huddle with that guy!

Matt 9:02 AM  

Gayest. Comment. Ever.

Zuch 3:34 PM  

Things have hit yet another new low as a Bears fan when I was actively wishing for Brian Griese to get into the game

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