Channeling my Inner Dana Jacobson

>> Monday


Fuck Notre Dame
Fuck South Bend
Fuck the Joyce Center
Fuck the Notre Dame Victory March
Fuck Leprechauns
Fuck 75% of the girls in the student section being named "Maureen" "Colleen" or some variant of "Mary (something)"
Fuck Mike Brey
Fuck Luke Harangody
Fuck the Golden Dome
Fuck the Four Horsemen
Fuck Legends, a bar with less character than a suburban TGI Fridays at noon on a Wednesday
Fuck sitting around in your room watching golf on a Saturday afternoon NOT DRINKING debating whether you should buy a new 300 dollar putter
Fuck Charlie Weis
Fuck Charlie Weis' fat ass
Fuck the yearly sense of entitlements to football National Championships despite only winning one since the Carter Administration. Florida won as many National titles this month as ND has won in the last 31 years.
Fuck people who think ND is an elite college football program, but in truth, don't belong on the same field as USC's practice squad
Fuck Kyle McIlarney
Fuck Chris Thomas
Fuck Touchdown Jesus
Fuck the mentality that Jesus gives a shit about how many touchdowns ND scores
Fuck the mentality that Jesus, if given a choice, would gladly score the touchdowns for ND himself
Fuck Rudy
Fuck the Gipper
Fuck Digger Phelps
Fuck Digger Phelps' highlighter
Fuck Digger Phelps' tie that impeccably matches his highlighter
Fuck Digger Phelps' ALWAYS picking ND, and NEVER picking Marquette when their resumes should direct the opposite picks
Fuck dickwad Joyce Center security who wouldn't let Vinnie bring his sign in
Fuck hick townies who rag on Marquette and Milwaukee when we're beating them by double digits
Fuck your bottomless endowment
Fuck Brady Quinn
Fuck Gold helmets
Fuck Green jerseys
Fuck Black jerseys
Fuck any campus that at any time has had TWO on-campus golf courses
Fuck that damn drum cadence that's been stuck in my head for two days now
Fuck the media's constant overrating love affair with ND
Fuck Regis Philbin
Fuck Hannah Storm
Fuck Steve Bartman
Fuck Josiah Bartlett


Happy 2,000 posts, YCS!

34 comments:

Iain 2:50 PM  

"Here, here I'll drink to that! Now where's that bottle of scotch I stashed in my office?"

Matt 4:06 PM  

They get a pass on Ryan Grant, but the rest are true.

Especially the line about them not belonging on the same field as USC's practice squad. No fucking kidding.

Iain 4:53 PM  

Straight off the internet, and as we all know if it's on the internet it must be true.


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Patrick 6:51 PM  

whoa, whoa, whoa...lets lay off the Hannah Storm criticism, she's still a babe.

Come on, don't you guys remember those NBA on NBC moments with her

Paul 10:31 PM  

You forgot one:
Fuck Danny Manson

Anonymous,  12:21 AM  

I love it, Vinnie writes an article on how the YCS we all love is dead. This is immediately followed by an explosion of new material and posts. God bless you guys if you weren't such horrific sinners.
Phil Nevin

Matt 1:34 AM  

Yeah, we kind of went the other way with that. I think he was just trying to justify not having posted for a long time. We're still here, so don't worry.

Vinnie 12:51 PM  

I had the same exact thought, Mr. Nevin. More than that, the sudden flood of material has included sophomoric jokes about Pat Summit's sexuality and a gratuitous string of "fuck"s, unwarranted vitrol aimed at a rival fanbase, and a nonsensical copied-and-pasted GChat. So much for the selectivity thing.

As Matt said, we have no intentions of calling it quits, just as you didn't when the Padres cut you loose. I was just trying to lower our readers' (i.e. your) expectations (further).

Vinnie 12:52 PM  

Re: Iain's comment

Crap! I think that still puts us lower than Tony Romo and LeBron!

Iain 4:53 PM  

You have to remember that's an avereage. We all know that the journalism department brings that down at least 25 points.

Zuch 1:09 AM  

Hey now, I do read the blog at least once a week Iain (and post at least three times a year). I mean, the brilliance in majoring in a dying industry (in a shitty economy no less) cannot be measured by simple IQ tests.

Anonymous,  4:35 PM  

Hey Vinnie, you could write for SI
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/writers/ted_keith/01/29/freeagent.allstars/index.html?eref=T1

chuck and schmitty 4:12 AM  

"Fuck your bottomless endowment"

Sorry you're poor.

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