YCS Book Launch (Preview!)
>> Tuesday
It finally happened. The end. Of decency. Of hope. Forever. Doom. Gloom. Death. BB756, 8/7/07. Add it up and multiply it by stuff--you'll get 666.
Well I could get angry. I could get mad. I could get upset. But I won't. Because I've already taken action. I'm fixing all that.
That's right. No longer will tainted records pass by as mere numbers on a page--unqualified, unequevicolly accepted, un-illegitimatized. Because that's all changed...
....with my new book! The Purified Book of Major League Baseball Records and Statistics.
You'd better believe Barry* Bonds*'s record* will be asterisked in my book. So will his single-season homerun record*. As will any other accomplishment from these last twenty dark years that we now know as the "Steroid Era."
But I didn't stop there. I couldn't rest until every record and large-scale accomplishment in the history of Major League Baseball was flagged with its appropriate details and discreditations.
Unfortunately, the book isn't quite ready for publish. However, in the name of this blog's boundless pursuit of puritanical purity, I offer you this preview:
Barry* may feel like a big man tonight, but it won't be long until baseball fans and non-baseball fans alike will know the truth--that every baseball record they hold dear may be tainted with the taint of impure taintage. And no one will ever tackle us.
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4 comments:
Is there a pitcher in the annals of baseball lore named "Night Train" Lane, or are you referring to former NFL Defensive Back Dick "Night Train" Lane, who got into the HOF based solely on the fact that he clotheslined the absolute fuck out of anyone that came within 10 yards of him.
He also is the second best defensive back ever, probably behind Deion. Lane couldn't cover for shit, Deion couldn't tackle. A perfect combo.
I think somewhere in this crazy head of mine, I had "Night Train" Lane pegged as a Negro League pitcher. I should know better than to rely on my memory.
Haha, I'm noticing now just how many typos/mistakes are in my "book." My "publisher" is gonna be pissed.
They only used muskets before the 1890's? I thought they used them in the early 1900's too. Isn't that why they call it the Dead Ball Era?
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