Some of Chicago partying like it's 1993

I first heard the news of Ken Griffey Jr. being traded to the White Sox in the form of a "breaking sports report" by a Chicago classic rock disc jockey (who's name I believe is Steve Downs) on my drive into work yesterday morning. As the details of the trade were yet to be released, he jokingly suggested that the White Sox had offered Navy Pier in return--which I guess was his clever way of saying, "something of tremendous value."

Ok, no big deal. Classic rock DJ doesn't fully realize that Ken Griffey Jr. can no longer play center field and that his .753 OPS is rather pedestrian for a corner outfielder. I give him a pass. He is--after all--a classic rock DJ.

Mike Downey, on the other hand, is just really, really confused what year it is.

Some other things Mike Downey is stoked about:

• the new 386 processor
• the upcoming season premier of Northern Exposure
• MCI's new "Friends and Family" plan
• Hot Shots, Part Deux
• the McLean
• [other 1993ish-era pop culture reference]

What's funny is that even the Honorable Capt. J. Obvious Mariotti has the sense to realize, "The White Sox are not getting the first-ballot Hall of Famer, the Ken Griffey Jr. once endorsed for president by Nike, the phenom who scaled fences and blasted home runs in flurries and defined the essence of the five-tool stud."

So to Steve Downs or whatever your name is, I say: Stick to classic rock.

To Mike Downey: Fire up that 386 beast at least once every four or five years, and look up some stats.