NBA Draft Declaration, Rightful Ranking

I, Matthew Zuchowski, would like to enter my name in the 2007 NBA Draft. After taking a year off after graduation to better prepare myself for my professional career, I feel like taking the next step. As a 6-1, 280 pound(hey, that's what my ID card says) forward who can step out and hit the occasional three along with setting a mean pick, I figure a team in the market for the next Oliver Miller or Tractor Taylor will definitely be calling(You'll be put on hold in a second Isiah). While I may rank a few spots below Wilson Chandler, I definitely think that I rank ahead of Monty Singh Harika. If you don't initially believe me, just check out the tale of the tape.

Weight: 280(before my afternoon snack) to 180-You need to have a solid frame to endure the physical pounding endured in the Association. Harika clearly trained in the wrong direction dropping that 100 pounds.

College: My last year experiencing the Big East at Marquette greatly trumps Harika's time in the declining A-10. While Marquette was manhandling UConn and their five top 40 draft picks, GW was defeating the Duquesne's and St. Bonaventure's of the world.

Experience: 4 years in college to 1. In that time, I sharply honed my physical skills. In this last year, I believe that I have mentally prepared myself for this grueling challenge. Harika is just another young kid with a dream, unable to handle the challenges of higher education.

Shot: While Harika may be a reputed shooter, viewers of my game have come away in awe after witnessing my set shot from God. Said shot also translates to Beer Pong, in my grueling battle with Nate for gold in the 2006 Beerlympics. If you think Pacman Jones makes it rain, you ain't seen nothing yet.

Attitude: Unlike Harika, who seems to have a sense of entitlement, I would gladly accept my role as a towel jockey and understand when I'm a DNP-Coaches Decision. Harika would be a major problem in the locker room and his lack of intangibles could greatly harm a potentially successful team.

Conditioning: While it would appear that Harika's training program would have him in much better shape, the possibility strongly exists that he will overextend himself. Plus, as Kansas State freshman Bill Walker has ably demonstrated, my eating junk food skill will be greatly valuable to my time on the pine.

If these salient points have not convinced people, I'm really not sure what will. I would also like to announce that I am in the market for a new agent (Mike Conley Sr.?), and expect them to file the paperwork mumbo-jumbo so I can start my rigorous training.