Raw (Zone) is Still War (Zone)
>> Monday
Tonight, I watched my first WWE Raw Zone in years -- in fact, the last time I watched it, it was still WWF Raw. Here are some various musings based on tonight's show:
1.) The RKO is a Stone Cold Stunner without the kick in the gut:
2.) Jeff Hardy still kicks ass. Usually high-flying wrestlers break something or wear out all their cartilage after one or two years in the WWE. Not Jeff Hardy. The dude still put in the most acrobatic performance of the night. And he knocked the shit out of some big Samoan guy's ass with a "steel" chair.
3.) In a "sport" with virtually no enforced rules, it still bothers me that a guy can lose a match for being out of the ring for more than 10 seconds. I mean, a third-party wrestler (who's not even involved in the match) can come into a match, knock a guy out with a chair, and the match proceeds as if it was all legal. Yet, if I guy gets knocked out outside of the ring and doesn't get back in time, he loses. Bogus.
4.) Jerry Lawler is probably on steroids too. Have you seen him lately? Even the announcers are taking steroids. Why aren't people calling out Vince McMahon instead of Bud Selig? How many wrestlers are going to die young before somebody puts the squeeze on this guy and his business? Why not call these guys up to Capitol Hill?
5.) King Booker is the second worst black character wrestler of all time. I was going to say that the Godfather was the worst. Then I considered Papa Shango. Then, a Wikipedia search revealed that both characters were the same guy, Charles Wright. They all suck. The WWE turns these guys into clowns. I mean, it might sound a little racist, but why not make a black wrestler totally hip-hop? If the WWE can create white trash characters (like the guys pictured to the left, the current tag team champs), why can't they come up with a couple of hardcore gangstas?
6.) I have no idea why anyone would watch this garbage. "There is not a single good character in pro wrestling these days. " I admit, this notion probably fits into Vinnie's argument that every year people say, "The cast of SNL is one of the worst ever". Then, ten years down the road, people get all nostalgic for the Jim Breuers and the Horatio Sanzes that they loved so much. But seriously, there's probably not going to be another Rocky Maivia.
7.) Candice is from Milwaukee?! Man, finding a chick like that in Milwaukee happens like once every decade!
Posts
5 comments:
Damn, I'm shocked that a 1,000 word wrestling post didn't come from me first. Anyway, seeing as how I still watch Raw and Smackdown every week and go to a sports bar each month to watch the PPV's.
First off, you're dead on about the steroids, but Congress or anyone that can do something about it won't. Their testing system is toothless and deep down, Vince always favors the roided up guys.
I actually prefer today's WWE to the Attitude era, but that's because it has gone back to more of an old-school type feel, especially Smackdown.
While the King Booker character may be over the top, I still love it. I actually disagree with you in that it's one of few characters that goes away from the black stereotype. He does slip in between the royal character and Booker T when he gets mad, which gives the character a needed second dimension.
Randy Orton kicks all kind of ass, and he's finally channeled the dickhead that he reportedly is off camera into the ring.
Jeff Hardy has been real good in his year since coming back. Matt may be even better in singles on Smackdown.
The situation you referred to with Jeff intefering with the chair was a No-DQ match, so it's legal for him to come crusading in with the chair.
For the next Rock, check out Smackdown, with MVP. I think he's their next real breakout star, although Cena's awfully close from just a wrestling standpoint. I thought Mr. Kennedy also had a chance, but he's quickly getting lost in the shuffle on Raw.
in re: Candice
What do you call a hot chick in Milwaukee?
A tourist.
in re: that hacky local humor
What do you call a hot chick in Matt's presence?
Kidnapped. [rimshot]
Thanks Zuch... I knew you'd be good for some more enlightened comments on the state of WWE.
I know that it was a no DQ match, but still, there are plenty of times when the rules are not enforced... and suddenly the 10-second rule gets pulled out of nowhere.
Another big gripe about the current WWE (from what I can tell) is that no one seems to have a great, captivating nickname. Everybody just goes by their real names.
There are definitely fewer goofy names, although guys like Undertaker and Boogeyman compete on different WWE brands. Even in the cases of fake names of Mr. Ken Kennedy, they sound more realistic.
Also, they have recently gone to more DQ and count out finishes. I've actually become a big fan of this, as it protects guys from doing unnecessary jobs. Unless someone is rising to champion/main event status, I don't believe that you need to get a clean win over a comparatively equal wrestler.
To sum things up, I can understand why someone who became a fan during the Attitude Era may not like the product as much since it has significantly reverted back to an older feel. My favorite era would be 1980's NWA(which later became WCW), and I like that a lot of the trademarks of that era have re-appeared today.
Post a Comment