It's as if I created this story myself

Someone alert the queen--Brian Fuentes was stripped of his title as Colorado Rockies' closer!

Excuse me for reveling a bit in someone else's failure, but it's rare that a single story indulges me with such a convenient illustration of so many favorite baseball rants: the overselection of closers in the All-Star Game, the banality of the save stat (as well as that of its more retarded cousin the blown save), the fickleness of bullpen production, the superfluousness of the "closer" title, the profuse stratification and categorization of players on MLB rosters... They're all right there in a tiny purple and black package, personally gift-wrapped for me!

So to you, Brian Fuentes, the player I was most displeased to see on an All-Star roster besides Freddy Sanchez, thank you for being my anecdotal evidence. I truly appreciate it.