Once Again Proving Why We're the Greatest Country in the World

America: a country so breathtakingly free that even our astronauts are allowed to get totally blasted on the job. This story is pure brilliance. If you're too lazy to click on the link, here's the headline and sub-head:

Drunken astronauts reportedly allowed to fly
Independent panel cites ‘heavy use of alcohol’ before launch, sources say

"So, let me get this straight. You're going to strap me on top of tons of combustible fuel and shoot me off into space in some contraption built by whoever was willing to do it for the least amount of money? All right, fine, but I'm gonna need to get totally plowed first."

Coming next week in part two of this report:

Drunken astronauts reportedly wake up to find "hot" Russian companion on international space station much less hot than previously believed