Never Turn Your Back on the Drunk and Victorious

HT: The Offside Rules

Read more...

Mike's Extremely Half-Assed EURO Final Preview

With Germany set to face off against Spain, the cliches are out in full force. On one side, the free-flowing, attacking, passionate, hot-blooded, flairful Spaniards nicknamed La Furia Roja or "The Red Fury." In the other corner, the efficient, clinical, efficient, controlling, efficient, aggressive, calculating Germans. Even their nickname, Die Mannschaft is efficient since it only means "The Team."

No doubt the Final, broadcast as part of a doubleheader Sunday after Becks' LA Galaxy visit suddenly-hot DC United, will also be awash in historical allegory. The Germans are looking to cement their fourth EURO title. The Spaniards looking to end decades of choking in major tournaments. Hitler. Franco. Catherine of Aragon. Kaiser Wilhelm. Maximus. Sergeant Schultz. Each of them will be suiting up for their respective sides and will have an influential role to play in the outcome of the game.

As for the game itself, I'm not even going to bother doing a preview. One, because I honestly have no clue who is going to win. Two, because picking soccer games at this level is always a crapshoot. Three, because I am too biased in favor of my one-quarter-countymen, the Germans. Four, even if I weren't, Germany looks better on paper, but the Spanish look like a team of destiny...if not for the fact that they've never been a team of destiny. So while the Spanish may be looking to head Germany their biggest ass-kicking in Austria since the Von Trapps, I gotta go with the Germans.

My call: Germany 3-2. Sorry for wasting your time.

Read more...