Fortune's always hiding...

British bookmakers have offered potential gamblers odds that Illinois rookie Senator Barack Obama will trade his meteoric rise in politics for a shot at the Premier League. Odds are presently listed at 10,000-to-one that Senator Obama will abandon his Presidential campaign to take over as the head coach at London-based club West Ham United. Hammers coach Alan Curbishly resigned today.

Obama has allegedly been a Hammers supporter since visiting England five years ago. Usually with huge, long odds like this one, it's almost worth it just to put down like 5 bucks and see what happens. (i.e.: Really wish I'd put some money down on Sarah Palin three months ago when I first heard her name bandied about for the GOP VP position.)

But even here it's a waste of money.

Stat geek sidenote: There's better job security in politics than in the EPL. Only four managers have been in their current posts longer than the 3 1/2 years Obama has been a Senator: Sir Alex Ferguson (Man United), Arsene Wenger (Arsenal), Rafa Benitez (Liverpool), and David Moyes (Everton).

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FSC's Studio Announcers hurt my head

Yes, I know I'm probably the only one on this blog who watches FSC, but earlier today, with Fulham up 1-0 at halftime (and having not won on the road in 34 games), the studio host with his British accent said,

"It's been 34 games since Fulham lost one on the road."

I sat stunned. He got the storyline of the game completely wrong. Then I translated into American English.

"It's been 34 games since Fulham LAST WON on the road."

Damn English...

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International $occer

The English Premier League has announced that they will look into the possibility of one-upping the NFL and having each team play one game on foreign soil each season. I'm sure we'll hear the same refrains of "for the good of the game" "expanding our international exposure" or "bringing the game to the world's fans."

I don't buy it for a second.

EPL officials have brought up the NFL playing games at Wembley as an incentive for the change; a way to expand internationally when the market is tapped-out domestically. Just as the NFL cannot get any bigger in the US than it already is (Hence the "Toronto Bills"), the EPL cannot get any bigger than it is in England. It is also the most widely-followed league in the world. It is also a completely different situation from the NFL.

COMPETITION

The NFL schedule is a 16-game slate; six division games, four games against an intraconference division, another four against a division from the opposite conference, and two games chosen for a variety of reasons, which is a catchphrase for TV (This is partly why the Colts and Patriots have played each other every season the past five years.) Each season, any given team will not play 18 of the teams in the NFL.

The EPL schedule is a 38-game double round-robin. Every team plays each of the other 19 teams once at home, and once on the road. The team with the most points at the end of the season wins the title. In case of a tie, goal difference is the first tiebreaker. Under the "International EPL" plan, there would be a 39th game, with pairings decided by a blind draw, so that no team loses a home game.

The blind draw is presumably to give it a color of parity. Though it seems odd that the EPL seems so eager to protect the comeptitve integrity of the competition by not scrapping any home games, yet tosses away the "Every team twice" rule that has been part of English football for over a century so easily. In the end though, there WILL be winners and losers. One team will get to play Wigan Athletic three times, and one team will have to play Manchester United three times. This could very easily lead to unjust results. While it would seem exceedingly rare that a team would lose the title on goal difference, other harmful results could come about just as easily.

The top four teams at the end of the season qualify for the next season's Champions League, a finish that is worth tens of millions of dollars to teams. Even more valuable is what happens at the bottom of the table. While if the Miami Dolphins lose a bit of competitive advantage by giving up a home game, and finish in last, the only punishment is a couple of Leno jokes and the difficult decision of what to do with that #1 draft pick. In England there is no draft. The teams that finish at the bottom are relegated to their AAA. This can mean Darwinistic ruin very quickly. Leeds United was in the semifinals of the Champions League as recently as 2001, but following two relegations, they are now plying their trade in England's AA level, on a budget relative to their former EPL rivals as the Toledo Mud Hens would have to the Boston Red Sox. If another club finished in 18th and dropped, just because they couldn't make up a goal difference in a made-for-TV game against Arsenal while their 17th-place (and surviving) team got a patsy for their international game, there would be outrage.

SPREADING THE GAME

Who are we kidding? I can't blame the NFL for attempting to take the game international. Its following is only in a handful of countries, and has its largest popualrity in North America. Soccer is the most popular team sport in the world. FIFA has more member countries than the United Nations. Any idea that this is "spreading the popularity of the game" is a naked lie. This is nothing more than a cash grab, plain and simple. In addition, it will be a cash grab for the clubs who don't need it. While there might be packed stadiums in New York and Sydney to see Liverpool, Arsenal, or Chelsea, will there be the same kind of revenue injection for a neutral site game between Bolton Wanderers and Sunderland? (Bonus points if any YCS staff member has heard of EITHER of those teams). The rich will get richer, and the gap between the Big Four and the rest of the EPL will widen. The EPL does not have revenue-sharing in the sense that we would recognize it.

INTERNATIONAL IMPACT
And what would any of this money be used for? To buy more players? Are there any players left? The EPL is the most lucrative league on the planet. More international stars ply their trade in England than anywhere else. League leader Arsenal does not start a single English player. The International appeal of the EPL is one reason why FIFA's president is suggesting a rule prohibiting teams from starting more than 5 international players (The so-called "6+5" Rule).

In addition, the playing of EPL games in foreign countries does nothing to help promote those countries' domestic leagues. How does an EPL game in New York help the development of MLS? Red Bull New York draws sellout crowds for exhibitions against foreign superclubs, but draws 15,000 for league games. However, even that game presumably brings in a few people who have not followed RBNY before, and if they get a good result, maybe picks up some fans. How does a game in Tokyo help the J-League, or a game in Sydney help the A-League; two successful, but relatively fledgling leagues in the same position as MLS, with the skilled players but without the tradition and big names of the English top-flight?

I may be wrong, but I'm having a really hard time seeing how this move is good for anyone besides the owners of the Big Four.

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US National Team Good Enough to get Relegated from the Premiership

SI.com offered "Fulhamerica!" as its title, but I wanted something that sounded less like some cheesy stage show.

US National Team member Eddie Johnson signed with Fulham FC of the English Premier League. Johnson is the fifth American on the West London club's 25-man roster; joining fellow "colonials" Clint "There aren't enough rap songs about soccer..." Dempsey, Carlos "Charley Blackmouth" Bocanegra, washed-up goalkeeper Kasey Keller, and Chicago area product and all-around badass Brian McBride.

Sadly, Johnson may not be a Premiership player for long. It has long been agreed on internet message boards devoted to the Beautiful game that the best team in MLS is probably on par with the best team in the League Championship (England's Triple-A) or the worst team in the Premiership (still would be one of the best 40 teams in the world). Sadly, in Fulham's case, this appears to be a dead-on prediction.

Each season the three worst teams in the EPL are sent down to "the minors" and replaced with three of the best teams from the League Championship. Fulham is presently in 19th out of 20 teams- five points from safety and will need Johnson's scoring touch to kickstart their escape from the drop zone.

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Calling Out Unrealistic Fans No Matter What Continent They Live On

The torches and pitchforks crowd is gathering along Anfield Road.

Liverpool FC supporters are growing increasingly unhappy with the American ownership of their club. (LFC is currently run by an organization that includes Texas Rangers owner Tom Hicks). Protests are being launched, and during last night's 2-2 draw with Aston Villa, banners hung reading "If it ain't broke, don't Hicks it," and "SOS Dubai, Yanks Out" in reference to a Dubai group's takeover bid for the club.

This gets publicity because Liverpool has a worldwide following. At times the Reds at appear to have the best fans in Europe , and at other times appear to have the worst fans in Europe.

Not having read the Merseyside fanzines, and really only getting what trickles across the Atlantic, I'm not that well versed in the nuances of Hicks's ownership. If any Scouser out there wants to fill me in on what the big hubbub is, then please do so. That being said, to me, it looks like the Kop (Liverpool's supporters' section) is delusional on this one, on the level of that of a Notre Dame football fan.

The sign of "If it ain't broke don't Hicks it" was what brought me to this conclusion. First of all, no team in the English Premier League embraces its history as much as Liverpool does. This is with good reason. During Chelsea FC's recent dominance, Reds supporters would routinely chant, "Fuck off Chelsea FC/You ain't got no history/ Five European Cups and Eighteen Leagues/ That's what we call history!" The basic assumption being that while Chelsea had experienced some recent success, they did not have the sustained success and history of Liverpool.

It's a wonderful argument to make, and Liverpool eventually won that game, but Chelsea ended the season 15 points ahead of Liverpool (3 pts for a win, 1 for a tie), so all the tradition in the world didn't appear to help Liverpool.

Bottom line is, Liverpool have been non-factors domestically for the better part of the last two decades. They have not won the English top flight since 1990, and have NEVER won the Premier League, the only team of the "Big Four" (Liverpool, Man United, Arsenal, and Chelsea) to never have done so (The Premier League was formed in 1992). The closest they've come was a second place finish in 2002, where they still finished seven points behind Arsenal. They've finished fourth or lower 9 times out of 15 EPL seasons, and are in danger of making it 10 for 16 this year. (At writing time, Liverpool was in 5th place.)

In all competitions (Including domestic and European Cups), Liverpool have collected silverware on 7 occasions since the formation of the Premier League. In contrast, during the same time frame, Man United has won 15 titles (including 9 league championships). Arsenal has won 10 titles (including three league championships). And Chelsea who "ain't got no history" has won 9 (including two leagues).

Of the Big Four, Liverpool plays in the oldest ground, and was the last team to embrace summer touring to gain fast cash and international appeal. While Liverpool IS moving to a new stadium in two years and IS planning a North American tour this summer, everything seems to be a step slow at Anfield Road. Their youth development is not quite on top of things. Only two players who get regular playing time for the Reds came up through their youth system as opposed to being purchased or signed from other teams.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it? Liverpool, you have one of the most successful clubs in Europe. Like your fans' own banners read "What other teams dream, Liverpool have achieved." Other teams would kill to be in a position like Liverpool. But if you want more, and you say that the team was just fine before Hicks came in, then you're every bit as delusional as a Notre Dame fan who thinks that just because they won titles years ago that it's their right to go 12-0 every year. If the team's "broken", then it's been broken for 20 years. Hicks came in and bought the team last year. Do the math.

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