Alright, let's get the last act of this worn-out gimmick out of the way. (Thankfully, it's 60% copy and paste.)
With this year's Hall of Fame ballots due on Dec. 31, ESPN.com takes a closer look at four hotly-debated cases: Jim Rice, Andre Dawson, Bert Blyleven, and Goose Gossage--all players who received more than 50% of the vote last year.
So while they waste their time doing that, we at YCS lalalalala lalala la something something something something la la.
December 26 -- Scott Brosius and Paul O'Neill
December 27 -- Eric Davis and Devon White
December 28 -- Wally Joyner and Dante Bichette
December 29 -- Bobby Witt and Harold Baines
December 30 -- Jose Canseco and Ken Caminiti
December 30--The Whisteblowers
The case for Caminiti:
Four words: No lengthy induction speech!
The case against Caminiti:
Ugh. The beard. I mean, did he really think that was a good look? Gag. Other than that, I can't think of any reason he wouldn't've gotten in.
The case for Canseco:
You talk about an athlete! Man, the muscles on that guy were just something. That sculpted physique he had when he first broke onto the scene--no one had ever seen anything like him before. It was almost like it couldn't be real. Plus, let's look at the name literally: "Baseball Hall of Fame." Did Canseco not play baseball? Is Canseco not extremely famous? Is there not a hall where we honor these famous baseball players? Well, there is. It's called the Baseball Hall of Fame, and that's exactly where Canseco belongs.
The case against Canseco:
Canseco was good, but to me, when I hear the name "Jose Canseco," that doesn't say Hall of Famer. To me, you know a Hall of Famer when he walks in the room. To me, a Hall of Famer looks like a Hall of Famer. Waves like a Hall of Famer. Smells like a Hall of Famer. To me, I should be able to watch one swing from his game action and be able to say "Hall of Famer." To me, I should be able to look at a zoomed-in, black-and-white photo of a player's cornea and say with certainty, "That's the magnified, black-and-white cornea of a Hall of Famer." To me, Canseco just wasn't one of those guys. To me, he's not a Hall of Famer. To me, he doesn't get my vote.
So that concludes our five-part series "Famers on the Fringe." You'll all be receiving your laminated hard copy as a special insert in our next issue.